Finding What’s Lost

I’ve been feeling pretty lost lately.  I have no job and have had crappy luck finding one, though I’ve had several interviews.  My middle son has been having some pretty extreme behavior issues in school and at home again the last couple months after several months of doing better.  My finances are in ruin.  I haven’t been doing great with my diet and exercise, due to the stress, depression, and anxiety from everything else.  And a few other personal problems I am choosing not to discuss in my public blog.  I feel like I’ve been slowly losing myself over the course of the last few months… so what is a woman to do?

I have been distant from my spirituality for quite some time.  I have been overly skeptical and leaning away from anything spiritual, focusing more on the logical and scientific ways of thinking.  But I’ve gotta say, in tough times like these, science doesn’t bring me any peace of mind.  So I’ve decided to start back in with my spiritual studies.  A couple nights ago I asked my faithful tarot cards for guidance, and some wonderful wisdom came from them on all accounts of my current challenges.  Then last night I picked up a couple of my Laurie Cabot books and started reading her philosophies on Wicca/Paganism, and how she applies it to other faiths and walks of life.  I’ve gotta say, she is the person I left off with when I walked away from my spirituality, and she is the person reeling me back in and making me feel at home.

1016521_146840648841411_1015105813_nBasically the philosophy is, no matter what you believe in, or what terms you use for the Divine, it’s all the same.  You can put a name to it, you can call it God or Goddess, you can worship, meditate, pray to yourself or with others, but no matter what, you’re still calling on the energies of the earth and the Universe to aid in your needs, and the needs of others.  Even science confirms that directing energy with thought works.  So not only do I have the analytical part of my brain appeased, but I can get back into the spiritual side of me, where I find companionship with like-minded people, and comfort knowing the Universe has got my back.

I plan to start going to a women’s group I’ve been considering joining for about 2 years now.  I will start meditating when I can, and seeing my therapist again. And I’m going to take back control of my body for my own health and well-being as well.  I’ve been slacking in many ways of self-care, and it’s time I start taking care of me again, so I can be the best I can be for not only myself, but my family as well.

I believe once I get back on track, everything else will start to fall into place, just as it should.

Continued Healing

This will likely be my last Panniculectomy surgery update for quite some time because there’s not much left to say.  As of yesterday, Thursday April 27th, I am 5 weeks post-op.  I saw my surgeon for a check up on Tuesday, and everything is well.  The splitting in the middle is almost all the way healed, and the splitting on my side/hip is still open and rather deep, but healing at a fairly quick rate.  The doc said it looked good, and to just keep it clean and dry.  I am officially off of all antibiotics and doing well.  Very little pain, if any.  Just the occasional zing of nerve pain from having a big portion of skin removed which is totally bearable, some muscle aches and pains if I sit still for too long at a time, and phantom itching for the part of my skin that is gone.  But besides that I feel mostly normal again.  I have to continue to wear my compression garments for a few more months, which I am comfortable with since I have some swelling and a lot of scarring at this time.

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On the left: Summer 2015, 270ish lbs. On the right: Spring 2017, 210ish lbs. and post-panniculectomy.

The garments I have are probly about as comfortable as they can get, so I don’t mind wearing them most of the time.  I don’t have to see the doctor again for another 4 months, and that’s just for another routine checkup.  Plus my belly looks slightly lop-sided, and we just want to make sure that’s going away and looking great by that time in my recovery.  If not, I may discuss a repair, but I’m hoping we won’t need to go down that road.

 

I am going to continue to see my nutritionist so that I can continue down my healthy path and proceed with documentation in support of a breast reduction.  I will be eligible as soon as October for that surgery, but I think I will likely wait until at least January just to give myself a break from all the surgery recovery pains, to make sure I’ve lost the weight I want to lose and firm things up a bit, and to make sure I’m not going to miss half of next summer in recovery.

Once that surgery is complete, I will be done with surgeries in regards to loose skin.  For one, I don’t have insurance that will cover anything more.  And for another, I do believe I can firm things up from here with some vigorous exercise and willpower to keep at it.  Since the Panniculectomy I have been slowly losing more weight, even being sedentary.  I think it changed my metabolism a bit, and I look forward to taking advantage of that soon.  At my 6 week mark, which is next Thursday, my activity restriction is lifted and I will be riding my bike and hitting the gym at least a couple times per week.  I’m really looking forward to it.  I don’t think I’ve ever actually looked forward to exercising.  But without that embarrassing belly flap, I have nothing to fear.  I am currently at 209 pounds, and my overall goal is 175 (though government BMI standards say I should be around 135, I think I would look anorexic if I got down to that weight…. I still want some curves!). I know I can accomplish 175 with more hard work.

Thanks for reading along with my surgery journey.  I hope I have helped those of you who were trying to decide if this surgery was right for them.  I hope I have given you what you need for information if you were going through struggles with the recovery.  I hope I have provided support or encouragement for those of you also on a weight loss journey.  Good luck to you all, and thanks again!

How Do You Get Skin Removal Surgery?

So I have had several people ask me “how do I go about getting that surgery?”  So I’ll tell you what I did, and what the requirements are for most insurance companies (in the USA, anyway).

First of all, my weight had been an issue for years.  Ever since I had children, my metabolism was slow and I could never seem to take off any weight.  Admittedly, I was rather lazy and made poor food choices as well.  So after a few years of my family doctor telling me I needed to lose weight, and me genuinely wanting to but never making progress, she referred me to a nutritionist.  However, insurance didn’t cover a nutritionist.  So I was sent to Surgical Associates in Grinnell, IA.  That clinic specializes in bariatric/weight loss surgery, such as the gastric sleeve and gastric bypass surgeries.  I wasn’t really interested in such a surgery, but decided if I couldn’t lose the weight with proper nutritional counseling, it may be something I would consider.

At Surgical Associates, there is this amazing nutritionist/nurse Stef Noun.  She is the most upbeat, amazing weight loss cheerleader I have ever met.  She was always so inspiring to me, and every visit I had with her made me that much more motivated to take off the weight.  And since she was so encouraging, I never wanted to disappoint her.  She taught me how to eat properly, for nutrition rather than just for pleasure.  She taught me that I shouldn’t deprive myself of what I want, but I should use strict moderation.  She helped me cut out soda, limit carbs, focus more on protein, and really set me on the right path for my nutrition.  She also encouraged me to be more active, and always wanted to know my plans for diet and exercise at every visit, which was once per month.  At those visits she also documented any issues I was having with my sagging fat and skin, such as rashes, headaches, back aches, and things such as those.

For most insurance companies, all it takes is 6-7 months of regular documentation of following nutritionist instructions and proving you can change your lifestyle (losing at least a little weight) to be accepted for bariatric surgery.  I went ahead and submitted to insurance my request for the bariatric sleeve.  I was approved.  I refused the surgery because I thought I was doing pretty well without it.  And within a few months I had lost too much weight to qualify anymore.  I was able to use Stef’s tips and encouragement to lose the weight myself.  I know that is not possible for everyone, and that is why there are programs such as theirs.  My story just happens to be that I was able to lose it on my own.

Now, when it comes to the skin removal surgeries, most insurance only covers the Panniculectomy and Breast Reduction.  The Panniculectomy is the removal of the pannus, or the skin beneath your belly button that hangs over your pubic bone and hip area.  It does not include the repair of any muscle splitting from childbirth or obesity.  In order to have either of those skin surgeries, you need to have a steady weight for at least 6 months, and 6-12 months of documented health concerns directly related to the sagging skin, such as rashes or skin infections.  Once you have met those requirements, you’re eligible.

If any other skin removal surgery is desired, such as arms, thighs, back, buttocks… that’s up to you to pay for out-of-pocket.

And for those of you curious, I have state insurance – Medicaid, and it payed 100% for my Panniculectomy.  I plan on having the breast reduction as well sometime in the next 6-12 months.

Disclaimer: this was MY experience.  I’m sure insurance requirements and coverage can change at any given time.  So be sure to check with your healthcare providers and insurance companies for the up-to-date requirements and coverage.